I'm caring for someone
Home for the holidays — does Mom or Dad need more help?
Photo: Tima Miroshnichenko / Pexels
Look for changes since your last visit: weight loss, unopened mail, spoiled food, missed pills, new dents on the car. One sign means a conversation. Several together mean it is time for more help.
What to do
- Walk through the house with fresh eyes: the fridge, the mail pile, the pill bottles, the bathroom.
- Ride along on one errand and notice the driving, the walking and how they handle money at the store.
- Ask what a normal day looks like, and write down what you notice, with dates, so you can compare next time.
- Book a visit with their primary care doctor and ask for a memory check and a review of all their medicines.
What to say
Mom, I noticed a few things this visit that I want to help with. Can we look at them together, and can I come along to your next doctor's appointment?
Say it in private, when you are both calm, not at the dinner table with everyone there.
What to watch out for
This is a sensitive stepSmall details here can change the outcome, and some mistakes are hard to undo. We highly recommend a free 15-minute call with us before you decide.
Waiting for a fall or a hospital stay to force the decision. Help arranged calmly now is usually easier on everyone, and it gives your parent a say in it.
Better done together
We’re here to help
Noticing that a parent needs more help is hard, and the conversation that follows can be even harder. We help you sort out what you saw, what kind of help fits, what their coverage may pay for, and how to start the conversation with love rather than alarm.
Every situation is different, and these are sensitive moments, so we look at yours with care. We often see what others miss, and we never take commissions from insurance companies: the only thing we are working for is what is right for you.
Free · 15 minutes · No pressure
The rule behind it
There is no law here, only a few useful tools. Medicare Part B covers a Yearly Wellness Visit once every 12 months, and it includes a check for signs of memory problems and a review of medicines. The Eldercare Locator (1-800-677-1116), a free federal service, can connect you to your local Area Agency on Aging and to services for older adults near you.
Sources
- Medicare.gov — Yearly "Wellness" visits
- Eldercare Locator (U.S. Administration for Community Living)
- Your own notes from the visit
Amanda Alcodia
Education, not medical, legal or insurance advice.
Useful next steps
Start with the free Kit. If your situation needs a person, the intro call is free too.